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ACTING   How I wanted to learn, to change, to improve! I didn't want anything else. Not men，not money，not love, but the ability to act． |
Of herself as a child : "I'd listen to The Lone Ranger and get terribly excited. Not at the horses and chases and the guns but...the drama. The wondering of how it would be for each person in the situation... There are techniques to be leamed, and it's hard work. But it still seems sort of like play to me, and something you want terribly to do." "I think if other girls know how bad I was when I started they'll be encouraged. I finally made up my mind I wanted to be an actress and I was not going to let my lack of confidence ruin my chances." 1952, to Aline Mosby, sanguine about the acclaim for her perfomance in her first starring role, the crazed babysitter of Don't Bother to Knock: " I'm trying to find myself now, to be a good actress and a good person. Sometimes I feel strong inside but I have to reach in and pull it up. It is'nt easy. Nothing's easy. But you go on." 1953 in a New York Times interview: " My dramatic coach, Natasha Lytess, tells everybody that Ihave great soul----but so far nobody's interested in it. Someday, though, someday----"By this time Marilyn had appeared in almost twenty movies, invariably playing a beautiful blonde temptress who uses her looks to obtain her sly and calculating goal, generally tempting an older man who, intime, realizes the error of this ways. 1955: "The thing I'd like the most is to become a real actress. I remember when I was a kid at the movies on Saturday afternoon. I'd sit in the front row and I'd think how wonderful it would be to be an actress,you know. But I didn't really realize about acting. I appreciated what I saw. Bad, good, it didn't matter, I enjoyed it very much. Anything that would move on the screen. However, you know, I realize more and more the responsibility, and as I say, " I would like to be a good actress." 1958, to columnist Hedda Hopper: " I'm not a quick study, but I'm very serious about my work and am not experienced enogh as an actress to chat with friends and workers on the set and then go into a dramatic scene. I like to go directly from a scene into my dressing room and concentrate on the next one and keep my mind in one channel. I envy these people who can meet all comers and go from a bright quip and gay laugh into a scene before the camera. All I'm thinking of is my perfomance, and I try to make it as good as I kow how." 1961:"Being a movie actress was never as much fun as dreaming of being one. When I'd nealy given up, I got a break,. Then when I didn't want the studio kind of star roles, I was showered with them." The difference between theater and movies: " There's no audience watching you. There's nobody to act for except yourself. I't like the games you play when you are a child and pretend to be someone else. Usually, it's almost the same sort of story you made up as a child." 1962 " I really am trying to find myself and the best way for me to do that is to try to prove to myself that I am an actress.....My work is the only ground I've ever had to stand on. To put it bluntly, I seem to have a whole superstructure with no foundation. But I'm working on the foundation." |
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